Boond jo ban gayi Moti, - - - - - - -

To day, I am reminded of a poem, I read as a child. It was actually in our Hindi text book. The trigger is the anxiety, the uncertainty, lingering on in the young minds struggling to chart out a worthwhile course for them selves. Some thing that I share on daily basis being the father of one. The poem goes like this,

J/UON NIKAL KAR BAADALON KI GOD SE

THI ABHI EK BOOND KUCH AAGE BARHI

SOCHNE PHIR PHIR YAHI MAN MAIN LAGI

AAH KYON GHAR CHOR KAR MEIN YUN CHALI

DAIV MERE BHAGYA MAIN HAI KYA BADA

MEIN BACHUNGI YA MILOONGI DHOOL MAIN

YA JALOONGI GIR ANGARE PAR KISI

CHU PAROONGI YA KAMAL KE PHOOL MAIN

BEH GAI US KAAL IK AISI HAWA

WEH SAMUNDAR OR AAYI ANMANI

EK SUNDAR SEEP KAA MUNH THA KHULA

WO USI MAIN JAA PARI MOTI BANI

LOG YUNHI HAI JHIJHAKTE SOCHTE

JAB KI UNKO CHORNA PARTA HAI GHAR

KINTU GHAR KO CHOORNA AKSAR UNHAIN

BOOND LAU KUCH AUR HI DETA HAI KAR

When I go back to my struggling days it was the same anxiety, the same uncertainty and the hurry to get going. Having finally found my ground and having been walking on it for a good part of my life now, is there a sense of fulfillment, any sense of achievement, I am forced to at times think. Yes to the extent of having fulfilled my duties as a son, a husband or a father there is no regret. But was that all to my existence? There was one more relation that needed to be done justice to, that with the 'Self'. And in doing justice to others, have I done injustice to self. And if the answer is 'No' than, has it been worth it. Questions which have no easy answers.

Boond 'Moti' to ban Gayi par us 'Moti' kaa kya ho paaya. Kya us ko apna mukaam mil saka ?

For the drop of water which had set out with an uncertain future, turning into a 'Pearl' may have been a very big achievement. But once it turned into one, does it not fill her with even greater anxiety. The drop of water could have accepted the ignominy of falling in dust or evaporating in fire, the same however is not easy to take for a 'Pearl' which is born to be adored and loved. It is the aspiration of every 'Pearl' to finally be adorned in a worthwhile piece of jewellery. It can not accept being ignored.

Hence every step one climbs on the ladder of success one makes himself even more vulnerable to anxieties., the fear of becoming irrelevant some day. To quote SRK's biggest fear, 'What if I get up one day and find that no one recognizes me or runs for autograph'. Big deal, a normal human being would say, but very real fear for a man at the very pinnacle of success.

The success there for needs to be measured in terms of duties fulfilled selflessly and personal dreams realized without compromising on convictions and not if people around, or how many have taken notice. To be able to remain relevant to the out side world, one has to remain relevant to inner self and to the loved ones.

I am no SRK. My fear is more basic and simple.

What if I do not recognize my own self when I look into the mirror one morning?

What if the whole world runs after me, but my near and dear ones stop acknowledging me.

Will this price be justified to pay for any amount of success. ---- Naa hhhhh - - - - - - -

Rahe mere sapne to mere apnon ke sapne bhi to mere hi hain,

Kya karein, kitni bhi koshish kar lein

KABHI KISI KO MUQAMMAL JAHAAN NAHIN MILTA