Pengong Tso

For no particular reasonI am reminded of my days in Laddakh today

I am reminded of 'PengongTso'

Lake 'Pengong Tso'

I have spent some of my most memorable days,most creative days on the shores of 'Pengong Tso'

In Laddakhi language, lake is called 'Tso'

Lake 'Pengong',     -     'Pengong Tso'

As a newly commissioned 2^nd Lieutenant I found my self in Leh on my way to my unit further up on the Line of Control. The first experience of Leh was humbling to say the least. Rising barren mountains , not a speck of grass other than on the shores of rivers and streams and freezing temperatures. I was simply awe struck. I went berserk with my 35mm SLR Camera.

After a few days of acclimatization I was loaded on a 'Shaktiman'  and I  was off  to my unit. The introduction to unit , was some thing I will talk about some other time. To day it is 'Pengong Tso' calling. A few days in the unit and I was off again further up, bang on the border, where India ends.In the most hostile environment I had ever experienced in life, in actual battle like conditions, I found my self parked next to the  most beautiful lake that I have ever seen till date. She was  'Pengong Tso'

'Pengong Tso'does not end where India ends.

As if to say, these boundaries are your boundaries.

They don,t apply to me.

I am  the daughter of Laddakh.

She goes right into China,   -    miles into China

She, I was told is 140 sqare km in size, half in India, half in China.

Like a link of love  between two estranged brothers

What hit me was the vast expanse of the lake and complete lack of visitors or habitation around the lake.  I refer to her as a person because she has entertained me, soothed me, calmed my anxieties given me great creative insight, some thing I didn't know I was capable of and in general made me delve deep into my soul, explore within and become a more complete person.

'Pengong Tso' I remain eternally indebted to you and in love with you.

 I have experienced many emotions in company of her and one of them goes as under,

"Aaj jab mein yahaan is post par baitha hoon mere theek aage ye khoobsoorat Jheel 'Pengong Tso'  hai, Lake 'Pengong Tso'. Ye kaisi vidambanaa hai ki kudrat kaa ye khoobsoorat  karishama  kewal ek  Battlefield   ban kar reh gaya hai. Pataa nahin kyon mujhe aisa lagta hai ki 'PengongTso' hum se kuch kehti hai ,  hum insaanon se, jinhone is ke do tukre kar daaale hain. Mere dil mein jo khayaal uth rahein hain kuch is tarhaa se hain,"  ------

 

KHUDAA  NE  BANAAYAA  THA  JAB  YE  NAZAARA

YE  DUNIYAN  MEIN  SAARE  JAHAAN  SE  THA  NYAARA

THAA  KITNAA  YE  DILKASH,  THA  JAANAT  SE PYAARA

AE  'PENGONG  TSO'  TERAA  SUNDAR  KINAARAA

 

KUDRAT  YAHAAN  CHAEN  SE  REH  RAHI  THI

KHUSHBAAS  THANDI  HAWA  BEH  RAHI  THI

YAHAAN  AASMAAN  THAA  JAMAANE  SE  BEHTAR

YAHAAN   KITNA  CHAMKEELAA  THA  HAR  EK  SITAARA

AE  PENGONG TSO  TERAA  SUNDAR  KINAARA

 

MAGAR  EK  DIN  EK  INSAAN  AAYA

USE  YE  AMAN  CHAEN  BILKUL  NAA  BHAAYA

KHARE  HOKE  PARVAT  PE  USNE  PUKAARA

YAHAAN  MAEN  RAHOONGA  YE  MERA  HAI  SAARA

NAHIN  USKE  SAATHI  KO  THAA  YE   GAVAARA

YAHAAN   PHOOT  NIKLAA  LAHOO KAA PHUHAARA

AE   PENGONG  TSO  TERAA  SUNDAR  KINAARA

 

TARAKKI   PASAND  DUNIYAN   KI  SAUGAAT  YE  HAI

VAHI   KHOOBSOORAT   SI   PENGONG  TSO   HAI

AMAN   CHEN  JAJBAAT  SAB  KHO  GAYE  HAIN

TUKRE  BHI  AB  ISKE  DO  HO  GAYE  HAIN

YE  ITNAA  HAI  MERA  VO   UTNA  TUMHAARA

 AE  PENGONG TSO  TERAA  SUNDAR  KINAARA

 

KISI  NE  NAA  TUJH  SE  KABHI  KUCH  BHI  POOCHA

TERE  DARD  KAA  NAA  KABHI  KUCH  BHI  SOCHA

TERAA  JISM  BAANTAA  GAYA  JIS  GHARI  TAB

ROYAA  THA  CHUPKE  SE  SAARA  NAZAARA

AE  PENGONGTSO  TERA  SUNDAR  KINAARA

Kabhi kabhi sochta tha, ki yehi Pengong Tso agar kahin aurhoti  to iske paas bhi log hote, mehfil lagti.Jo khushi mujhe mili hai vo kitne aur logon ko milti.

Pengong , tere paas khoobsoorti hai par kadradaan nahin hain, aur agar kadradaan jyaada ho gaye aur Lakes ki tareh to ye khoobsoorti nahin reh paayegi jyadaa din.   Sach hi to hai,

KABHI  KISI  KO  MUQAMMAL  JAHAAN  NAHIN  MILTA

 

APNE TO APNE HOTE HAIN

Reunions are great. Especially the family reunions. There is so much to talk, so much to complain, so much to laugh about and so much to brood over. This is no different. Almost every one is here,

Buaa bahut burhaa gayi hain.

Diabetes has taken its toll. Face gives away the fatigue. She connects more to our generation than the one she belongs to, that of our parents. She is the youngest daughter of DadaJi and the age difference in her and the eldest sibling was some 18 years or so. She is also one of the two still breathing from her generation, the other being Papa Ji. And since Papa Ji was not able to come, Bua or 'Khalaa Jaan' as I lovingly call her, has suddenly found her self to be the eldest and in a great dilemma because of the greatness thrust upon her. Trying to strike balance between the newly acquired senior citizenship status and the child in her, Khala has failed miserably to every one's great relief. Some people are simply not meant to grow old. Our Khalaa is one of them. Be it age or illness, you are our generation Khalaa, and you dare not cross over.

Babbu, Dabbu bhi hain. Bare ho gaye hain , mote bhi.

They retain their tremendous sense of humor. Specially Dabbu. He is a Zonal Manager of some Drug Company and quite senior in hierarchy but here he is what he has always been. A chubby creature cracking jokes and pulling the leg of every one in sight. His wife and Baby, our sister are two of his targets today. And every one is in splits.

Baby apni bitiyaa 'Fairy' ke saath aayi hai

Baby ; one of the only two sisters between us, seven brothers, has had a tough life. Although she looks exquisite, and carries her self with great style but her pain is evident. She has had a failed marriage. I pity the guy who had and lost her. After separation she has looked after both her children all by her self and has done so well. The daughter reflects the upbringing she has received. Baby is very dear to me. My love for a girlchild has its roots in my love for her. I was five years old staying with DadaJi while PapaJi was in NEFA ( Arunanchal Pradesh) and was the youngest in the house than. We didn't have a sister. And than one day when I came back from school; MaaJi ( our Dadi) introduced me to the newest member of the family born to Vidya Chachi. I just couldn't wait for her to grow up and play with me. She took ages to grow up but when she did, she filled a void in my life. She has been special to me. It pains to see her alone, fighting the battle of life, and it fills me with pride to see the strength she displays. She was named 'Seema' initially and one day I changed her name, to 'DeepShikha', just like that. Actually it was lot of hard work. I had to rewrite all the Labels on books and notebooks. Her daughter has shaped up as a fine young women, every bit her mothers daughter.

Anoop BhaiSahib hameshaa ki tarah ' Lost Case' ki tarah ghoom rahe hain.

We have all gathered for the marriage of Anil Bhai Sahib's son, 'Bittu'. Anil BhaiSahib, TauJi's son and Anoop Bhai Saahib's elder brother, is no more. He decided not to wake up on the very day our other sister 'Guddi' was to get married. Strange coincidence it was. Ashok Bhai Saahib, the eldest of our brothers had departed a year ago in a factory accident. And than Anil Bhai Saahib went and that completely broke TauJi and TaaiJi. They lost the will to live. Loosing two of the three sons within one year, both at the young age of about thirty five was too much to take. It was only a matter of time before they would pass away. Anoop Bhai Saahib too has done some thing to his 'heart' and refuses to get operated. He retains his carefree boyish charm and face, but he is now the eldest in our generation, and tries to behave accordingly. He too fails, like Khaala. He has two chubby daughters who some how come across as more mature and worldly wise than him. But he is a darling. He is the one who has made sure every one comes for the marriage.

Pankaj BhaiSahib NeeraJiji Paramjit bhai bhi pahunche hain

I have issues with them, the pain of being let down by some one who one placed lot of faith on, is very sharp, very piercing.

Waqt nikal jaata hai, baatein reh jaati hain

But they are here and we are all trying to pretend there are no issues. This pretence is getting to all of us. But we don't let the wounds bleed. Pain is on both sides. I know. May be there were reasons I am not aware of , may be. But today it is a happy occasion after ages in the family. We have all made deliberate efforts to come together. We are not letting any thing spoil the mood. Apne phir apne hote hain.

Ye kahaani to abhi shuru hui hai.

Ye kahaani lambi chalegi.

Ye kahaani phir sahi.

life in a joint family, offers little bit of every thing.
some happy moments, some painful ones, some laughters, some scars, some betrayals some sacrifices.

KABHI KISI KO MUQAMMAL JAHAAN NAHIN MILTAA.

AANE WAALE KE MAN MAIN ASMANJAS -----

Dar saa lagtaa tha,
When 'Dada Ji' used to sleep in the 'Baithak' on 'Chataai'
The main room in the house was called ' Baithak'
It was reserved for the head of the family
Or guests,
And 'Dada ji' was the head of the family'
Ghar main wo 'Kharaaun' ( Wooden slippers ) pehente the,

So when 'Atal Ji' says,

BABA KI BAITHAK MAIN BICHI CHATAI,
BAAHAR RAKKHE KHARAAON,
AANE WALE KE MAN MEIN ASMANJAS,
JAAOON YAA NAA JAAUN ."

Some thing in the heart, __ connects

Papa ji would not speak to him, unless spoken to
he would never look into his eyes
Nor would any of his brothers, my Tauji or ChachaJi,

but it was different with us
We were grand children
We could get away with any thing
Almost

He would return from the shop every day,
He would have brought some thing for us children,
'Jalebi', or 'Kalakand' or 'Rabri'
He would ensure we all got our share equally'

During Summers it would be 'Mangoes'
Or 'Kharbujaas' or 'Tarbooj' in a big 'Baalti' full of water,
in winters it would be ' Gaajar kaa Halwa '
made in a big 'Karahi' in the big 'Aangan'

His 'Radio' , the only one in the house,
Would take ages to come to life,
And would play only 'All India Radio'
News, some times classical music
Playing movie songs was , well, Sin
And no one dared change the rules.

He would quote from 'Bhagwat Geeta' or 'Mirza Ghalib'
'Kabeer' or ' Ramaayan' at every occasion
He knew the tables from 2 to 100
With fractions in between
Table of 2.25, of 2.50, of 2.75' and so on
He was a walking talking calculator
He had been a Munim at some point of time in his life.
He would take us children to 'Company Baag' every morning
And we would go through the ordeal, still sleeping.
He was strict but a simple soul
We would cheat on him often
Or so we thought,
And he would get cheated,
willingly , smilingly
now we know.

He would eat four 'Phulkas' sharp at eight in the night,
He would chew every morsel 'thirty two' times,
He would walk hundred steps after dinner,
'Shatpadi' it was, he told us,
Just about adequate for proper digestion after dinner,

Festivals will be centered around him
He will do the 'pooja' only then we could touch the Diwali 'crackers',
Or the Holi 'colors',
he would eat, and than we would get to eat
the 'Halwa Poori' and ' Kheer'

He was the living 'Deity'
What we learned around him, we never learned in any school,

All of this and more flashed in front of my eyes as I entered the
family home after some twenty years. I had gone for a marriage
of my elder cousin's son. Bhai Saahib, my cousin too has departed
since than and so many others, Dadaji, Maaji, Ashok and Anil Bhaisaahib ,
Tauji, Taiji, both the Chacha Ji's and Vidya Chachi, my foster mother
Almost every one who made that house, the home that it used to be.

I stopped going there, I just couldn't
and than I entered the house again, after more than tweenty years
it was amazing, how every thing was same and yet nothing was femiliar

Us 'Makaan' main to pahunch gayaa par us 'Ghar' ko dhoondta raha,

Ab Baithak ke baahar Kharaaoon nahin hain
na kisi ko koi dar yaa asmanjas hai, andar jaaoon yaa naa jaaoon
Dadaji ab so chuke hain,
sadaa ke liye

Kuch puraane log mile bhi, to waqt ki raftaar se haare thake se.
khud main bhi to ab wo kahaan raha .
samay bahut aage le aaya hai hum sab ko

Chalo sab na sahi
par kuch log to abhi hain
jo mujhe usi dunia main hone kaa ehsaas
ab bhi de jaate hain,
itna bhi kyaa kam hai ?

KABHI KISI KO MUQAMMAL JAHAAN NAHIN MILTAA